De regula, unde scrie imbecilitati, e gandirea lui beteaga. Unde scrie ceva inteligent si amuzant, este George Carlin.
Cel mai prost om din lume: Asta`ti violeaza indiferenta de fiecare data cand se da pierdut ceva. Impersonalul "se da pierdut" sa nu blameze din greseala pe cineva. Sare`n scena precum broasca`n iaz cate`un destept sa zica "Tre` sa fie undeva. Sau a facut picioare si`a plecat" ? Ca tre` sa fie undeva, se subintelege. Orice lucru e undeva, ocupa un loc definit in spatiu. Nu vreau sa`l contrez. Nu vreau nimic de fapt, decat sa ma gandesc ca odata, demult, am pierdut pisica. A facut picioare si`a plecat... http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/clisee/a-facut-picioare-si-a-plecat
George Carlin: I lost my yo-yo.''Well, where did you have it last?' 'HEY...if I knew that, I would still have my yo-yo!'' Well, it must be somewhere.''Right!''Well, it just didn't get up and walk away!'That one always got to me...it just didn't get up and walk away. One time, I lost the cat...it just got up, and walked away!
Cel mai prost om din lume: Nu, nu ai dreptul, nu aici si nu azi. Aici ai permisiunea sa taci. Ca si acolo. Doar ca eu sunt ponderat mai sincer. Peste noapte lumea s-a trezit cu drepturi. Ireale. Imaginare. Inchipuite. Inventate. Fictionale. Ca Mos Craciun si Scufita rosie sau vrajitoarea din Hänsel și Gretel. Suna bine, iti dau oarescum impresia de securitate, singura problema e ca nu exista. Sunt permisiuni, si acelea, temporare. In orice moment al existentei tale, poate aparea o entitate sau o forma de autoritate care sa te priveze de acele "drepturi".Nimic nu`i al tau niciodata si daca stai sa te gandesti bine, n-a fost al lor niciodata. Oriunde exista termenul de proprietate rezida ideea unei autoritati ce candva, demult, a jefuit pe cineva. Pentru ca ulterior sa vanda acel ceva jefuit si sa-ti tina prelegeri despre cum sa nu furi. Vechiul si bunul dublu standard, la maxim. O sa revin daca am timp, si daca-mi dati dreptul... http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/clisee/am-dreptul-sa
George Carlin: Boy everyone in this country is running around yammering about their fucking rights. ''I have a right, you have no right, we have a right.'' Folks I hate to spoil your fun, but... there's no such thing as rights. They're imaginary. We made 'em up. Like the boogie man. Like Three Little Pigs, Pinocchio, Mother Goose, shit like that. Rights are an idea. They're just imaginary. They're a cute idea. Cute. But that's all. Cute...and fictional. And rights aren't rights if someone can take em away. They're priveledges. That's all we've ever had in this country is a bill of TEMPORARY priviledges; Property is theft. Nobody "owns" anything. When you die, it all stays here.It's the old American double standard.
Cel mai prost om din lume: Politica, sau hai sa-i spunem artistic credinta patetica in intelepciunea colectiva a prostiei individuale. Caci politicianul, oricat de blamat pentru diversi dracusori , trebuie admis ca provine din parinti romani, familii romanesti, scoli si universitati romanesti, biserici sau afaceri romanesti si in ultima instanta e votat de romani. Nu de mine, de voi. Asta`mi oferiti. Si asta nu va da dreptu` sa va plangeti, voi i`ati ales. Fie putere sau opozitie, sunt ai vostrii. Atata puteti oameni buni. "Romania e de cacat" va reprezinta. Mi-e rusine de asta si mi-e rusine de voi. http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/politic/despre-politica-si-greseli-in-acceptiunea-generala
George Carlin: boy, everyone complains about politicians. Everyone says they suck. But where do people think these politicians come from? They don't fall out of the sky; they don't pass through a membrane from a separate reality. They come from American homes, American families, American schools, American churches, and American businesses. And they're elected by American voters. This is what our system produces, folks. This is the best we can do. You voted them in. You caused the problem. You have no right to complain.
Cel mai prost om din lume: Inteleg feminizarea limbajului si aparitia numitilor termeni prin faptul ca oamenii au probleme cu realitatea, si`n tentativa lor de a se proteja de ea, inmoaie limbajul. Apar eufemismele Inteleg feminizarea limbajului si aparitia numitilor termeni prin faptul ca oamenii au probleme cu realitatea, si`n tentativa lor de a se proteja de ea, inmoaie limbajul. http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/diverse/minichestiuni-lingvistice/vulgaritatea
George Carlin: I don't like words that hide the truth. I don't words that conceal reality. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Americans have trouble facing the truth, so they invent the kind of a soft language to protest themselves from it, and it gets worse with every generation. For some reason, it just keeps getting worse.
Cel mai prost om din lume: dar a avut politetea sa lase un bilet…Cat de nobil !!!…si multi ar trebui s-o urmeze. Indeobste femeile, care statistic vorbind se sinucid intr-o proportie mai mica decat barbatii. Apoi cer egalitate. Hei, feministelor, implicati`va, puneti manuta pe streang, si echilibrati cifrele!!!
Sfat prietenesc : Carrefour are o reducere la funii peste weekend. PS : As vrea sa stiu rata suicidului intre cei ce viziteaza un psiholog si-i urmeaza negresit sfaturile. http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/diverse/madalina-manole-s-a-sinucis
Sfat prietenesc : Carrefour are o reducere la funii peste weekend. PS : As vrea sa stiu rata suicidului intre cei ce viziteaza un psiholog si-i urmeaza negresit sfaturile. http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/diverse/madalina-manole-s-a-sinucis
George Carlin: And I say guy because men are four times more likely than women to commit suicide, even though women attempt it more. So men are better at it. That's something else you gals oughta be working on. Well if you wanna be truly equal you're gonna have to start taking your lifes in greater numbers. Walmart is having a special on ropes this weekend. I'd like to know the suicide rate among people who call in to radio psychologists and actually follow the advice they get.
Cel mai prost om din lume: 4-5 ore hotarandu`se ce sa cumpere sau ce sa puna-n farfurie. Uite, aici ai 100 da mii, du`te mananca la KFC. Economisesc mai mult neimpiedicandu`ma de tine. Daca nu te poti decide ce sa cumperi, fa o poza, du`te acasa, realizeaza ce vrei si intoarce`te mai tarziu.Cand eu nu mai sunt acolo. http://www.cliseu.ro/blogs/blog1.php/diverse/la-cumparaturi-part-1
George Carlin: you know some guy smoked eight joints and he's gonna inventory my refrigerator. "Here, here's fifty dollars- go down to the Burger King. Willya, God! We'll save more than that on electricity alone. Close the goddamn door, willya?" Look, if you wanna know what's in there, why don't you take a Polaroid picture and go away and look at the picture and then come back and figure out what you want.
Ignore these four words.
The mayfly lives only one day. And sometimes it rains.
If the 7-11 is open 24-hours-a-day why does it have a lock on the door?
George Carlin
Etc.
